At The Playground

I wonder if there'll be any aspect of mothering that I can tackle with calm. I was a nervous wreck when I took the baby to the playground last week. There were so many kids zooming around on bikes and scooters or on foot, and he's just getting his walking equilibrium down, I was so afraid that he was going to get knocked down! He did actually trip over his feet, which sent him face forward into the corner of a bench, which then sent him flat on his back on the concrete. I froze, as if I could will Time to freeze as well and make the fall go unnoticed by my son, who miraculously didn't cry. He just looked up at me with a sad face, probably saying, "Why are you just standing there frozen, Woman! Hop to it, get me up!" We survived. The baby is so fiercely independent, the other thing stressing me out was the fact that once I let him go, there was no turning back without a fight - I couldn't hold his hand, I couldn't hold his hood, he wanted no parts of me as he explored the playground. Of course his favorite areas were the cobble stones, the dirt by the trees filled with roots sticking out, and the un-matted concrete areas, high-risk areas. I finally got too stressed and had to pick him up and leave, LOL. I'll get it together. Here's a little snippet of our playground visit:

Calming song by Cat Stevens, "The Wind"